Hello grand folks of Somiii’s ville *huge grin* Welcome to Somiii’s Convos. How was your week and how is today going, I had the busiest week. I was so busy i didn’t even have time to blog. Tomorrow is Mothers day YIPPEE!!!!! even though i strongly believe we should celebrate our Mums every day, I guess tomorrow is a day set aside to let them know how special they are. So make sure you appreciate all the women in your life tomorrow, married or not; mother or not.
I celebrate you MAMA, I love you forever and a day more. Happy’s Mothers Day in advance.
I present Episode five of The Tale
By the close of work on Tuesday, I decided I couldn’t take it anymore. So, I called Zara and told her I really needed to speak with her. During lunch at the cafeteria, I bared my heart to my now close friend. I told her everything! My feelings, thoughts, imaginations – everything. She shares my faith. So, I knew I could count on her for solid advice. I showed her the tales I’d written and for some moments she was quiet. She, apparently, did not know it was this intense.
After what seemed like forever, she spoke. She asked if I wanted to tell Kubi that I had a huge, major crush on him and I said I wasn’t sure. I, momentarily pondered the possibility of Kubi being aware already. For a while we contemplated and she said, “naah. He doesn’t know”.
Zara doesn’t think it’s a wise decision to tell him. She doesn’t see the path ending well and with good reasons. I asked her for her ‘strong’ reasons and she listed them out:
1. We work together.
2. He might use the feelings against me.
3. It’s a phase. Will soon pass.
Plus some other importants reasons.
We concluded it wudnt be wise. Wonderful conclusion, right? Right! However, what’s the use of a conclusion if its not adhered to.
Yeah. You heard me. Not adhered to.
On wednesday, all the MTs worked late into the evening. We had assignments from a training session to turn in. Our only time for the assignments were in the evening. So, we ended up staying 3 hours after 5pm. Steve and Olu left to go home which left Zara, Kubi and I in the office.
At around 9pm, we decided to leave for our houses. Zara stays about 20 minutes away, Kubi about 5 minutes away and I, 40 – 45 minutes away. On this fateful night, Kubi agreed to drop me at a point that would my trip home faster. Like I said, helpful.
Anyway, we said our goodbyes and I entered Kubi’s car. Zara was skeptical about it but we both knew that it would help me get home faster.
In the car, we gisted about work while he gave me a tour of the area surrounding the office. Kubi showed me all the cool spots and places for hanging out. As we went along, Kubi asked what Zara and 1 were always whispering about and giggling about.
I asked him what he thought we were taking about. Apparently, he had no idea and here I was worrying myself silly. He said he didn’t know. I decided there and then to take the kids’ gloves off. I just wanted the intense feelings go away. Please get me right. I’m not particularly interested in making a commitment to Kubi. My mind wanderings hadn’t gone that far. Ok well, sometimes. I don’t know him well enough to make such a gigantic decision. I just know I like him disturbingly a lot and it gets in the way of my work. I will confess that at first I enjoyed the feelings. However, it “aint funny no more”. I “wanna” go back to “just being friends” feeling even if I haven’t felt it for Kubi before.
So, I went the path less travelled. I told Kubi we were talking about him. U should have been there to see the confused look on his face. It was a priceless look. “Me?”, he said. “Yes”, I replied with a very huge laughing smile on my face.
He asked in his calm clean voice what he did wrong. I told him it was actually because of the things he was doing to right. There was another look of confusion. I, however, smiled on. At this point, I knew the beans would be spilled. I wasn’t sure of the outcome but I was ready to get the load off my chest. So, I told Kubi.
I told him about the first day and all the drama. I have no problems with self-expression. Hence, it was a smooth ride through the “outpouring” of my mind.
I didn’t profess any undying love for him. I just said how I felt.
When I was done, I looked at him to get his reply. For some moments, he didn’t say anything. I guess he was trying to concentrate on his driving which I didn’t quite get because we had a red traffic light in front of us.
After what seemed like an eternity, Kubi spoke. He said, “like everything, it will fade and if it doesn’t he knows what to do to make it go away”. He had a knowing smile that said this wasn’t his first time.
Unexpected, those words were but false, they weren’t. This is because I am really looking forward to a time when everything will be normal. There and then, a mixture of sadness and a teeny weeny bit of relief passed through my heart. I went really quiet and he did too.
I got down at my stop feeling really heavy with emotions and pondering some serious ponderings, all the while, telling myself ‘it’ll look better in the morning” and I hope it does.
Happy Valentine’s day. I will give y’all the gist on Monday.
p.s thank you for the comments.